There's a difference between guys and men... No?

So far in my life I've met mostly guys. The few men I met were good men who were married to good women. Well minus one who married the wrong woman because she made him believe she was pregnant with his baby.
But anyways. Guys say all the right stuff to get you to listen. But they have absolutely no clue what to do with it. So they jerk off and leave after 3 pumps. Claim the girls psycho or too clingy. Men do the job right and stick around. Guys call women cows. Men call them ladies. Men do not cheat. Guys do. Men do not manipulate. Guys do.
Here's some guys for you.
Nate. Lies, cheater, neglects the one he's "dating" and living with to lie to another saying he lives with his uncle. she gave up on him years ago. But he just won't leave. Blamed her for everything wrong. When it's not her fault he was like that before she met him. If she knew before what she learned she would have never given him the time of day.  Now he's living his karma for all his wrong doings. Breathing problems and no one here trusting him.
John... Haha sorry just pictured how he looks now. Fat, toothless, bald, ugly. He got his karma. Over compensating turns out to be the worst thing you can do. He over compensated because he was a major problem to anyone who met him. I'm glad he left. I'm glad to not have anything to do with him anymore either.
Matthew... I'm glad he didn't last long either. Full of life and deceit. His poor girlfriend. She deserves way better. Im glad he's not near me. I have been through enough with lying people. Glad he's gone.
To all the guys who thought I was too fat. Im glad you are a thing of the past. Because I deserve better. To the guy who says he wants me, but doesn't put effort into getting me or bring with me. Thanks, for not being man enough to do so. But good enough to step aside and not hold me back from moving forward. To the guy I just met this week. Honestly, you don't know what you really want nor need. I'm glad I didn't hand you my eggs and say "protect these" because you would have dropped them. I wish you luck in finding exactly what you want and need. I deserve a man who knows exactly what that is to him.
Thanks to a certain guy, no names being said. A couple years ago you came into my life to help make it better. You were a sight to see. But kind hearted. I wish I had more confidence in myself after everything I have been through. Even this past year from time to time I'd text to say hi. You were still kind enough to be polite. Even when I flirted or joked around. You didn't make me feel small or stupid. I felt comfortable. Why can't I meet a man like you who'd date someone like me? I even began thinking somehow you know John. I'm positive Russell knew him. It clicked in fast when I saw Russell, but i kept my mouth shut. You had to of known John. Because I didn't speak to him but somehow he knew about things only you and Russell knew going on. Not that it matters. But if John was a major drug addict i would think you were as well? I would hope not. But anyways.. it's too late.
Anyway,, my being messed up started with my family. And fighting to keep my sister's baby safe. I grew up in that crap. Im happy to not have anything to do with that family. And my sister trying to pretend to be family, that was a joke. And sadly Rain got hurt. But she learned why I kept her away. Now she knows not to do it again. That family is not worth it.
I've got friends who I don't associate with anymore. Mainly because they were drug addicts and I'm not and I have better intentions in life. I don't miss them anymore.
What I miss is being able to feel safe, sexy and wanted. Okay maybe not wanted but desired. Im writing a book. I got most of it done. But I need to go back over it and correct spots and add story to it. Change names of people in it. But for the most part I'm happy with it and where it's going.
Writing helped me get anger out. It helped me work on me too. I have dreams of being loved so right I forget I missed years of being held and loved. I never got to experience real honest to goodness love. So it goes without saying, I haven't met the man. Just guys....